Jokes as the World Turns

 
  • True Facts from College Geography Students: Tides are caused by the emotion of the earth around the sun.  The inhabitants of ancient Egypt were called Mummies. The Red River isn’t.
  • Border Dispute: for generations, a woman's family lived on a Manitoba farm bordering North Dakota, an area in dispute with the U.S. One day her grown kids told her that the dispute had been settled, the international boundary ran right through their farm, and the family could choose whether to be Canadians or Americans.  After some thought, the woman declared that they should become Americans. She said she couldn't stand another Canadian winter!
  • Will Rogers: Even if you are on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.
  • News Flash:  a woman was sitting in Starbucks, reading news on her iPad.   One headline read, "12 Brazilian Soldiers Killed."  The woman shook her head at the sad news, turned to the stranger sitting next to her, and asked, "How many is a Brazilian?"
  • Diner:  Waitress: Hawaii, Mister? You must be Hungary.
    • Gent: Yes, Siam. And I can't Romania long, either. Venice lunch ready?
    • Waitress: I'll Russia table. What are you Ghana Havre?
    • Gent: I prefer Turkey without the Greece. Can Jamaica cook step on the Gaza?
    • Waitress: What's got India? Why so Chile? Be Nice!